Longings

So...today has not been a good day. I just want to curl up in bed and wish the world away. This is SOOOOOOOOOO hard for me to write...there is still so much of me that wants to always be "up." I struggle with sharing this because its not fun, happy, hopeful. But I don't feel those things today...I just feel alone! And even though I KNOW that what I "feel" isn't what is truth...today it is hard to get past those feelings. I can't even get my booty in gear enough to go for a run.... :(

So...here are my guts...not real pretty today...but honest!!
Today I am longing...my heart hurts...

I long for companionship
I long for laughter
I long for warmth
I long for a strong hug that says it's ok
I long for help
I long for leadership
I long for a sense of home
I long for encouragement
I long to feel wanted
I long to feel needed
I long for security
I long for someone to hold my hand
I long for guidance
I long for a smile
I long for connectedness
I long for openness
I long for sofa talk
I long to be known


I long to give all of those things to someone else


I long for him